Thursday, March 03, 2005

Self-Absorbed...

The CSF Celebration Dinner is tomorrow night. It's kind of a big deal...I mean, we cook a big meal, people get dressed up, parents, alumni, church and university people come.....and we kind of show off CSF....

Here's the thing....I often forget that the night is about GOD. I get distracted with whether or not there'll be enough food? will the speakers do a good job and make sense? Is the slide show going to get done? will people actually bid on the silent auction stuff? if they don't bid, what will we do with the left-over stuff? will people think we're lame if we don't sell alot of stuff? will people be generous and give towards the mission trips?

I know....Todd is amazed at what a freak I am, too....but I ususally rationalize my worrying to myself by saying that I'm just trying to do a good job.

But the truth is.....It's all about me.

I don't want to look foolish. I want the ministry to look important and successful. I want people to say it was a great event.

Dumb.

Compared to how good God is, I'll never measure up, so why do I even try? Why don't I just rest in the fact that God is good, and if He's the focus of the dinner, it'll be awesome!!?

"The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness will be quietness and confidence forever." Isaiah 32:17

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